Products For The Resoundingly Average Child
No Child Left Behind indeed...
When you consider that the speed limit on the Learning Infobahn at our nation's public schools has been lowered to a mind-numbing crawl already, it's a wonder they don't start introducing children's toys like these to teach tomorrow's "resoundingly average" leaders and statesmen at a very early age that they're not alone in their mediocrity.
These playtoys are simply ingenius. The way I see it, if we start children out early with significantly lowered expectations, then eventually we won't have all these annoying liberals demanding accountability or or silly things like responsible, well thought-out "exit strategies" for wars we feel like declaring.
Nor will we be force-fed some outrageous and overly complicated fairy-tale about how live "evolved" from goo. Nope! This is the next generation of No Child Left Behind. How CAN we leave anyone behind when nobody's going anywhere at all anyway?!
posted by Devo @ 9:44 AM
13 comments
13 Comments:
Great - I love the "Smasher Breaker" - but I take issue with one advertised item on that site.
The "Portable Playground" is actually a pretty cool deal. Having spent hours in empty cardboard boxes as a child, I can attest to the wide range of possibilities they offer. For serious.
What is one day a fully furnished detective office can the next be a capsule hurtling through space. And what better way to find things to destroy with the "Smasher Breaker" than to search the outer reaches of the known universe?
My favorite is the xylophone.
Oh. So. Crazy.
hey devo. . .how are you doing?
now, why you gotta go and pick on the public schools? it's rough out here!
Andrew! Not bad, I s'pose.... Don't get me wrong, I think the teachers are by and large doing a fantastic job (and a necessary and honorable one, too) and it's not them (you, or DeadPanAnn) that I have a problem with. It's Ann's Principal, for example. I highly recommend her blog, by the way. She's an awesome writer, and her experiences as a new teacher are everything from gripping to heart-wrenching. Anyway, it's often the administrators and the legislators and others who are so far away from the actual classroom experience yet for some reason still make the decisions (about curriculum, discipline, etc.) that I have a problem with. Check out the article I hyperlinked, too. What's going on in Kansas is a perfect example. Other people make the decision of what to teach to whom and when to teach it, and it's flat-out irresponsible. I know that teachers are doing the best job they can with the ammo they've got, but when you hear about the college professor who was attacked for proposing a course presenting Intelligent Design as myth rather than rock-solid "God done tole me, goshdarnit" truth (in, you guessed it, Kansas) then you've got trouble...
Devo!
check out
www.consumerist.com
let me know what you think!
No Child left behind? I think somewhere in Texas, a child got left behind..
And I have issue with the dumbing down of the Afro-American community. I think rap is getting just as bad. Most of it. Mysoginistic (sp. ? See what happens when you dumb kids down, they forget how to spell!) consumer-driven bullshit, it didn't start out like that! it started out as valid social commentary, and has ended up as the nigger-machine that everybody's afraid to name. Grr.. it's heartbreaking.
I think any society will eventually fall to the lowest common denominator. I've never read it, but I heard the basics, of an essay on barbarism vs civilization , by Ouspensky. I'll have to Google htat now and take a read of it. He proposed that as people proliferate, the civilized get outnumbered by the barbaric. Sounds about right.
What's Up, Devo? It's been a awhile aye? Yeah, I see that you left me at the blogroll losers bracket but that's alright I won't hold it against ya', maybe above ya' but not against ya', I can't disagree with the whole unlearning curve and the Baby Bush Toys thing, it's a travesty you know....! I must give it to America "Land O' the Lazy and Home O' the Stupid", and please don't get angry if those of you are a bit patriotic because I really could give a rat's or a Bush's ass, give me a shout Monkey, later...
Blu~
on a second note, what's up with "no child left behind?" while i hope i have strong liberal credentials, i'm not afraid to be independent. are we against NCLB because bush is republican? beacause he's a failed president?
he may by dishonest, but NCLB is landmark policy. NCLB took great courage and it has had serious impact. scores _have_ increased.
we must expect that students perform at grade level. we must expect that schools provide challenging education programs. when we do not expect or require this, we cannot expect our schools to educate the "truly disadvantaged".
there are deep problems with NCLB: it's severely underfunded, it oversteps restrictions on federal supervision of schools, it penalizes the schools that need the most support, and it's regulations are often unclear. (yikes, that's a lot wrong!)
but, to me, NCLB updates the "green factors" . . . benchmarks set by the supreme court to enforce brown v. board. it recognizes that our schools are still deeply segregated and our students need a big brother (or sister) willing to scare off bullies.
NCLB ensures that students in the struggling public school districts will receive less money, per capita, than they were before implementation.
As an editorial (three or more years old now) in Harper's suggested, it's in the best interest of the monied few to keep the educational system of the majority mediocre. The United States is no longer a meritocracy, but God forbid some socially minded, educated scrapper should rise through the ranks to make some noise, point some fingers, draw the dullards' attention to the great beast in the sky.
No...Keep 'em dumb, keep 'em down. That's the name of the game these days.
Admittedly, I'm spouting rhetoric here, but the negative reaction to NCLB is not a partisan one. I'm independent myself, but this legislation is critically flawed, unless, of course, you're all for the dissolution of the middle class.
hungry,
you make fair points, except they're not accurate. all recent reports show that all 10 major urban school districts have increased test scores in the last 3 years.
any fearmongering about the middle class or meritocracy is must larger than nclb. there has been a devastating gap between the rich and the poor. this has increased severely in the last 10 years. however, this has no relevance to nclb. none.
AndrewandSamantha, the test scores are rising - in this you are absolutely correct - but over the course of a decade, these standardized tests have decreased in difficulty. I don't see the increase in scores as telling.
Furthermore, as I mentioned above, federal money is dwindling at unprecedented rates. As suburban districts increase funding - both through federal and local efforts (thousands of school districts now collect parental donations and, in wealthy districts, this makes the schools that much more flush) - the poor, usually urban, districts decrease their own.
But, as you suggest, fingers can not only be pointed at Bush or NCLB. However, by endorsing the NCLB system, Bush draws attention to "positive" news while turning a cold shoulder to the increasingly dire reality.
Lastly, although I like the idea of enforcing requirements that ensure teachers are competent and well-informed, NCLB has endorsed a host of teaching "programs" that require teachers to educate in a cookie-cutter fashion.
Knowing several NYC public school teachers personally, I frequently hear horror stories; I can't imagine having to hang particular posters or use particular examples while instructing students. Such a white-washing of education is rooted to the more general cultural trend toward homogeneity, but when dealing with the encouragement of curiosity, this doesn't bode well at all.
NCLB does attempt to address a serious problem. Good. But it does so by choosing the most myopic route available.
hungry,
i _do_ hear you. my mother in law agrees with you that standardized tests have decreased in difficulty. however, there is _no_ research to support this.
as a nyc public school teacher, i deeply understand there are serious deficits in our schools. i want to be clear, though. the problems are _not_ nclb. i believe this is very misguided. there has been a persistent, devastating segregation in public schools. you identify the key issue: school funding.
however, i believe you've misread the problem. let's redress budget issues and tax policy. let's redress job opportunities and equal housing. let's give incentives to great teachers to teach in high needs schools. let's equal pay for women and people of color. you know, when we organize revolution, i'll make signs, march, and scream. i'm down. but, i really believe that grade standards are an extension of brown v. board. grade standards are a civil rights issue.
please know, i've read your blog and i read your comments here and on *monkeys*. i deeply respect your ideas. but, i think you're wrong here.
nclb has actually _increased_ funding for the most devastated schools. (the problem here is not initial funding . . . it's the high stakes responsibilities that withdraw funding if schools cannot meet requirements.)
standardized curricula _can_ be very limiting. however, it can also be incredibly limiting to read at a 3rd grade level in 9th grade.
i agree that there are deep problems with nclb. but, i don't think you've reached them.
Andrewandsamantha:
How dare you continue to disagree! ;)
Seriously, though, I could be misguided. I'm basing my arguments on a lot of reading, but I'm the first to admit that the bulk of these articles were published in left-wing agenda rags. That said, the evidence presented was impressive, even if the authors selectively present the more damning material.
What touched me most, though, was the nearly unanimous outcry - a rejection of the course proposed by NCLB - on the part of public school teachers. Given that you are a teacher yourself, it's clear that not all folks feel this way. Your points about the need for reform - in terms of budgets, tax policy, housing, civil rights and economic incentives - echo those expressed in the articles I read, though the same arguments were more explicitly linked to criticism of NCLB.
I'll have to read more - to provide a counterpoint, perhaps some articles that celebrate NCLB - before I'm able to separate the NCLB plan from the push for further financial (and class/racial) segregation. It seems to me they are intimately related, but your refutation suggests I need to learn more.
Thanks.
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